Great post. In life, one also has to know `when to fold them'. I overstayed in a business I created with a partner and missed out on another opportunity. I should have sold out when a third partner bought in. Ultimately that business was not of my essence but of something that would be at best a hobby. Took me a few years after my eventual exit to get back on my own track.
I don't know how I decided at age 16 that I was going to get married right away and start having kids, but I am more and more grateful with every post here that the brainwashing didn't stick.
I think all those mid-life crises boomers could never shut up about was just the regret coming back home to roost. Older friends of mine, genxers mostly, just never went through that.
I'm going to have to disagree with our host: That seems like a fine cake to me. The piping is very neat and the whole thing looks professional.
I do have a question for the group: Is there any value for a woman to attend college simply due to the fact that a reasonable concentration of one-day high value men are there as well?
When my parents were in college, it was often the case that women were pursuing MRS degrees first and foremost. Even when I was in college there were many MRS degree seekers, though less than the previous generation.
Look at the ratio of boys to girls. If 30 boys and 70 girls are in the university she will study at, does she want to compete with the other girls? And of those boys, how many are cute enough to date?
How should a parent assist a high IQ girl (135-ish say) with finding a large enough pool of suitable mates that they won’t find stupid?
The Mrs. degree worked for me, but not until the graduate school level. The debt for that isn’t worth it now. And although it work out for me family wise, I probably have 1-2 fewer kids than I might have without grad school.
The push for the prioritization of education over having children is incredibly pervasive on modern society. This is also especially so in East Asian communities in the West.
From observation, anytime an Asian friend starts to date a woman, his parents will inevitably ask where that girl studied and what kind of job she has. There is a great deal of artificially attaching status to education and career as a means of evaluating the qualifications of the girl. A Korean girl I know chose career over finding a partner and having children thinking that the career would elevate her social status and thus give her access to better men. However, the time sunk into obtaining the career torpedoed her chances at getting a high status man, and so she settled for lower status desperately, speedily rushing into a marriage.
Perhaps this is partly a product of the idea of "having face". But this may be rather a product of hypergamy being exacerbated by the Asian folk idea that if you get educated, you can be officially credentialed, and thus have "official" higher status. The thinking amongst older Asians follows the pattern going like this: if having higher education works for men to have higher status and a better chance at getting good jobs and high pay, then it should be also the case for young women too. Afterall, a girl cannot be seen as an "illiterate" when competing against other women. The higher the education and career the better, so the thinking goes.
The irony, however, is that at the very top of Asian society, education does not matter as much as what family one comes from and how good a connection one turns out to be. Less time on education and more time in finding a reliable high status partner and having children is the primary goal in higher status circles. And from personal observation, men in higher Asian society place a great deal of importance on a girl's demeanor and how whether she is contentious or not.
Because men are still expected to pay a dowry to the women's families, in Asian culture. So middle class families do prefer wives who can contribute to the family income at a certain level. Whether she continues to work after baby birth, of course, depends on wealth level.
Regret, at least for me, is giving my heart to anything. Over time the joy turns to ashes. The only thing I've ever found that satisfies is God. Give him your heart and you will be satisfied.
We were in Asia a few months ago staying in a very expensive hotel for a family holiday with the boomer grannies. The pool was one of those infinity pools with an amazing view and the amount of women there in the late 30s early 40s in pairs drinking wine and taking 1000 pics of each others butts for instagram was just insane. Everywhere you went it was women of this age in pairs. The two that I called the "thirsties" because at the pool they just looked like they were keeping their 300 followers on insta happy ( probably all indians ) with their butt pics. Would have been hot at 20 but now at about 40 its just sad. We saw the thirsties a few times in the city as well during the day just walking about, and one of them, as i was walking with my kid and grannies, looked over at me with such an embarrassed smile. She knew times up. She knew when she´s 50 she will be doing the same thing. She knew..
They all end up knowing.
The sad part is that Asia is being taken over by these Thirsties hogging all the tourist attractions so they can get the perfect instagram shot.
Had a girlfriend who was all about climbing the corporate ladder and `changing the dominant male culture within it'. Involved a ton of travel and fancy hotels. The female version of `fancy pants'.
She died early due to cancer and her inner battle to dominate men.
If I can add something encouraging, almost all the groups of white people in the late teens early 20s were mixed. Hopefully they learnt from their older cousins, sisters etc.
"There is no offense more serious than this, which obliged the goddess to remember the remote time when she herself was an animal, the miraculous doe that escaped. But goddesses, even more than gods, don't like being forced to remember."
And this is precisely the reason why women were denied rights for the better part of human history. The most responsible teenager in the house is still a child (to badly paraphrase chateau heartiste).
Many women lost one right that is the most important human right of all, the right for a woman to take care of her own baby.
We managed, and I know that most people can manage, but still they tell women we could be an astronaut or a police officer, but many believe that it’s not OK for us take care of our own baby!
It took a lot of brainwashing for people to get to this aberrancy.
Until every woman has the right to take care of her own baby until she is satisfied of it, I don’t care about any other stupid rights
Great post. In life, one also has to know `when to fold them'. I overstayed in a business I created with a partner and missed out on another opportunity. I should have sold out when a third partner bought in. Ultimately that business was not of my essence but of something that would be at best a hobby. Took me a few years after my eventual exit to get back on my own track.
I don't know how I decided at age 16 that I was going to get married right away and start having kids, but I am more and more grateful with every post here that the brainwashing didn't stick.
This is what happens when you believe a lie.
Be skeptical. Question everything. Never trust the media. Live a simple life in harmony with reality.
I think all those mid-life crises boomers could never shut up about was just the regret coming back home to roost. Older friends of mine, genxers mostly, just never went through that.
I'm going to have to disagree with our host: That seems like a fine cake to me. The piping is very neat and the whole thing looks professional.
I do have a question for the group: Is there any value for a woman to attend college simply due to the fact that a reasonable concentration of one-day high value men are there as well?
When my parents were in college, it was often the case that women were pursuing MRS degrees first and foremost. Even when I was in college there were many MRS degree seekers, though less than the previous generation.
Look at the ratio of boys to girls. If 30 boys and 70 girls are in the university she will study at, does she want to compete with the other girls? And of those boys, how many are cute enough to date?
No. People don't often meet their spouses in college anymore.
How should a parent assist a high IQ girl (135-ish say) with finding a large enough pool of suitable mates that they won’t find stupid?
The Mrs. degree worked for me, but not until the graduate school level. The debt for that isn’t worth it now. And although it work out for me family wise, I probably have 1-2 fewer kids than I might have without grad school.
The push for the prioritization of education over having children is incredibly pervasive on modern society. This is also especially so in East Asian communities in the West.
From observation, anytime an Asian friend starts to date a woman, his parents will inevitably ask where that girl studied and what kind of job she has. There is a great deal of artificially attaching status to education and career as a means of evaluating the qualifications of the girl. A Korean girl I know chose career over finding a partner and having children thinking that the career would elevate her social status and thus give her access to better men. However, the time sunk into obtaining the career torpedoed her chances at getting a high status man, and so she settled for lower status desperately, speedily rushing into a marriage.
Perhaps this is partly a product of the idea of "having face". But this may be rather a product of hypergamy being exacerbated by the Asian folk idea that if you get educated, you can be officially credentialed, and thus have "official" higher status. The thinking amongst older Asians follows the pattern going like this: if having higher education works for men to have higher status and a better chance at getting good jobs and high pay, then it should be also the case for young women too. Afterall, a girl cannot be seen as an "illiterate" when competing against other women. The higher the education and career the better, so the thinking goes.
The irony, however, is that at the very top of Asian society, education does not matter as much as what family one comes from and how good a connection one turns out to be. Less time on education and more time in finding a reliable high status partner and having children is the primary goal in higher status circles. And from personal observation, men in higher Asian society place a great deal of importance on a girl's demeanor and how whether she is contentious or not.
Many Western Asians are low status back home, so it is an inferiority complex.
Its not really possible to "just be high status"
Because men are still expected to pay a dowry to the women's families, in Asian culture. So middle class families do prefer wives who can contribute to the family income at a certain level. Whether she continues to work after baby birth, of course, depends on wealth level.
I had a chance to get into Bitcoin in 2010. Fear is the mind killer. That is totally true.
Is this the same for a man? My life hasn't exactly worked out the way I'd like. Some stuff that I'm working through now to try and get what I want.
Regret, at least for me, is giving my heart to anything. Over time the joy turns to ashes. The only thing I've ever found that satisfies is God. Give him your heart and you will be satisfied.
The irony of what I assume to be a picture of her family hanging on the wall behind her
I guess she wanted to... have her cake and eat it too.
We were in Asia a few months ago staying in a very expensive hotel for a family holiday with the boomer grannies. The pool was one of those infinity pools with an amazing view and the amount of women there in the late 30s early 40s in pairs drinking wine and taking 1000 pics of each others butts for instagram was just insane. Everywhere you went it was women of this age in pairs. The two that I called the "thirsties" because at the pool they just looked like they were keeping their 300 followers on insta happy ( probably all indians ) with their butt pics. Would have been hot at 20 but now at about 40 its just sad. We saw the thirsties a few times in the city as well during the day just walking about, and one of them, as i was walking with my kid and grannies, looked over at me with such an embarrassed smile. She knew times up. She knew when she´s 50 she will be doing the same thing. She knew..
They all end up knowing.
The sad part is that Asia is being taken over by these Thirsties hogging all the tourist attractions so they can get the perfect instagram shot.
-Solipsism-
Had a girlfriend who was all about climbing the corporate ladder and `changing the dominant male culture within it'. Involved a ton of travel and fancy hotels. The female version of `fancy pants'.
She died early due to cancer and her inner battle to dominate men.
There's a reason for the term "left-over women".
If I can add something encouraging, almost all the groups of white people in the late teens early 20s were mixed. Hopefully they learnt from their older cousins, sisters etc.
"There is no offense more serious than this, which obliged the goddess to remember the remote time when she herself was an animal, the miraculous doe that escaped. But goddesses, even more than gods, don't like being forced to remember."
It’s 1:30 PM here and all I can think about now is cake with chocolate icing. Thanks Vox
I like fruit on a cake. But it has to be a torte cake and needs proper whipped cream.
Most icing is trash anyways.
And this is precisely the reason why women were denied rights for the better part of human history. The most responsible teenager in the house is still a child (to badly paraphrase chateau heartiste).
Many women lost one right that is the most important human right of all, the right for a woman to take care of her own baby.
We managed, and I know that most people can manage, but still they tell women we could be an astronaut or a police officer, but many believe that it’s not OK for us take care of our own baby!
It took a lot of brainwashing for people to get to this aberrancy.
Until every woman has the right to take care of her own baby until she is satisfied of it, I don’t care about any other stupid rights
. I don’t. GAF!!!
This is the only substack where I read every single article.