Sabotage
Women don't realize how often other women sabotage them
I thought this cute little article about a woman’s hair and how men clearly favor one of her hairstyles was remarkable for the way the female author clearly managed to miss the most important aspects of the story.
The 23-year-old, who lives in London, has naturally tight blonde ringlets, which are always being complimented by the women in her life. But when it comes to men, the office admin assistant had a feeling her romantic interests preferred sleeker locks - and decided to conduct an experiment to test out her hypothesis earlier this year.
Speaking exclusively to Femail, Abby explained how she created two separate Hinge dating profiles - one with images of her with her hair straightened, and the other with photos of her curls.
She said: 'When I was out, I noticed the difference in the male attention I’d get when my hair was straight versus when it was curly. When I straighten my hair, I feel like it's almost a guarantee that I'll get more attention from men. So, I was interested to find out if it would be the same on dating apps.'
Unsurprisingly for Abby, her theory was absolutely right - and her straight-haired profile received 142 per cent more likes than the one featuring her natural locks.
However, Abby says women will often compliment her on her curly hair these days - adding that it's a great 'conversation starter'.
This isn’t an example of burying the lede so much as avoiding it entirely. The fact that women are always complimenting her on something that men observably find significantly less attractive is an obvious example of female sabotage and intrasexual competition among women. She’s far from a 10, but she’s sufficiently attractive to compete with the average woman, and thereby inspire sabotage.
Whether some men might prefer the natural curls on the right or not is irrelevant. The point is that she’s being actively encouraged by other women to pursue a look that men clearly, and by a substantial margin, find less attractive. No doubt they also tell her that she’s “too skinny” and “really needs to gain a few pounds” too, and how cute she would look if she cut it all off.
I’ve also noticed that some women take an instinctively negative attitude toward male compliments and preferences all on their own. They seem to take an almost perverse pleasure in wearing clothes and hairstyles that clearly don’t suit them at all, and actively avoid utilizing those that do. But that’s another matter entirely and probably stems from deep-rooted psychological issues that are well beyond the casual observer to identify and understand.
Anyhow, if you’re a woman who suspects that you’re being sabotaged by the compliments of your female friends, there is a very easy and obvious solution. Just ask five random men if they like X or Y better. If there is a significant contradiction between the male and the female preferences, you are being sabotaged.
So - and this is the important point here - don’t do what the women suggest.
The ultimate version of this is the hideous, obese high school sociology teacher preaching feminism, lesbianism and transgenderism to young, pretty high school girls while diligently striving to infuse them with a dread of marriage and children and using her authority and influence to steer them towards pursuing a liberal arts degree at the most expensive school they can get into. Fat feminists who have hit the wall despise young, pretty women who are interested in marriage and children with an absolutely demonic fury. Also, get your children out of public schools and home school if you can.
"So - and this is the important point here - don’t do what the women suggest."
You'd think this would be obvious but I've noticed something with this phenomenon—the more it's against male preference, the more women will gang up to put on the pressure. You made a passing comment about getting a buzz cut (or somebody in your hive actually went for it)? You WILL shave your head. The girl council has decided. Ah, so fresh! So bold!
Probably why my mom, who has never approved of anything I do, got weirdly enthusiastic about me cutting off my nearly waist-length hair for a "pixie cut" that made me look like a 12-year-old boy right before high school graduation and roped in her flying monkey hairdresser to convince me it didn't look terrible.
See also: the involuntary "trim" I got from my mom as a preteen that took off multiple inches and left me crying myself to sleep (I think this was one of the only times my gamma dad decided she went too far); my cousin her mom who chopped off their hair for Locks for Love heavily implying that the hair on my head rightfully belonged to cancer patients.
My single 29-year-old sister who still lives with our mom has a matching "pixie cut."
My dad was one of the only voices, passive as it was, who countered the relentless pressure from other women to cut my hair off. I decided to ask my college boyfriend if he liked long or short hair and never went back. I met my husband a few years later in my mid-20s. Long hair and femininity became an act of rebellion as my family descended further into liberal madness.
I just had a daughter two days ago. She's currently sleeping next to my husband as we wait to be discharged this morning. I plan to keep my hair long, teach her how to maintain her hair which looks like it'll be wavy like mine, and tell her like it is.