29 Comments
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Jbearman's avatar

There's not a better teacher than failure. If you want to improve and learn, you have to try and fail. People too afraid of failure to just try never manage to grow much.

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Harrison's avatar

Fascinating read! I’m Harrison, an ex fine dining industry line cook. My stack "The Secret Ingredient" adapts hit restaurant recipes (mostly NYC and L.A.) for easy home cooking.

check us out:

https://thesecretingredient.substack.com

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Eric R. Ashley's avatar

Patience of a Saint is a good novel about other people wanting you to stay mediocre.

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IAM Spartacus's avatar

I find many people don't really understand "risk" and see them as reason to not do something. In business it could mean the risk outweigh the pros, but in dating it pretty much never means "don't do it". It just means to think about what you are getting into. About the only risk that might mean "don't do it" is if there are cultural issues or a baby daddy.

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NotYourPalFriend's avatar

The Alphas (and Sigma) I've known have always encouraged me to take risks, and are generally very optimistic about potential outcomes.

The Deltas and Gammas have always reacted with fear, but differently. The Deltas pull back, but generally wish you luck.

The Gammas try to talk you out of it / sabotage you, as pictured in the comic.

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Dave's avatar

The gamma makes a poor wingman and I can't recall them ever helping with logistics at all. One of Roosh's big insights, in PUA, was that a man who is willing to help with your physical chain of events is worth his weight in gold. An alpha/bravo would loan you their place for the night or even their car if they thought it would help seal the deal.

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J Scott's avatar

The fear of most Deltas and Gammas makes them hard to tolerate.

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J Scott's avatar

It reminds me of women in the workplace. The sky is always falling + we had better wait

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Okrahead's avatar

The righteous are bold as a lion

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Jefferson Kim's avatar

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take"

"Failing toward success"

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Balkan Yankee's avatar

Never take the counsel of your fears or random idiots.

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Sicilianswitchblade's avatar

The sooner you step in and take that beating metaphorically, or in reality the sooner you can get into improving or understanding your limits and begin pushing beyond them.

Low performance smart boys got it all figured out though. Just ask them !

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Uncouth Barbarian's avatar

It's so weird that people listen to advice from people that are obviously less successful. I mean, I get opening up to friends, but there's a line, a limit, to how helpful that advice can be on certain subjects.

So, seek the advice of those expert on the subject. Doof is literally talking himself out of a friendship, whether he knows it or not.

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JW's avatar

The world is full of boring, fearful, mediocre men. Men who are not only afraid of failure but also of even minimal discomfort. The nice guys.

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William Palafox's avatar

By far, the regret most often expressed to me by other men: "I wish I had enlisted." Always a myriad of reasons why not, some as reasonable as charting out a different course in life, but whenever I talk about sailing past a smoldering volcano in the Aleutians or watching a lunar eclipse with howling Afghans in Ghazni, the look in the eyes is there. There was a life out there to be lived, and they chose not to pursue it.

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Charlie Pyne's avatar

And they try to talk you into following their actions they want reassurance on. "You should get vaccinated"

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Vlajdermen's avatar

Never take advice from someone who's worse off than you.

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Monkeyb00y's avatar

One of my good friends told me to never have kids because he didn't like having kids or something.

Then again, he wasn't married to the mother because it's "just a document" although they lived together.

They have 3 kids, too.

Family is wealth and all jobs work to support the moms who raise our children.

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Vlajdermen's avatar

Low status narcissism at play. It didn't occur to him that his distaste to having kids was his own problem, and you may not share whatever circumstances lead him to it. It's telling a man he can't have steak because a baby can't chew it.

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Raven's avatar

The mark of a quality friend is one who encourages your endeavours, regardless of their personal thoughts on the matter. No great man has ever concerned himself with the opinions of pedants and critics.

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Vlajdermen's avatar

The creator is inherently superior to the critic. It's one of the coolest and truest things Vox ever said.

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jad's avatar

Followed by a "I told you so! I was right! All along! I am the smart one!"

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Vlajdermen's avatar

Enter the smart guy who - I'm sure, by pure coincidence - has nothing to show for his smarts.

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Missy's avatar

If I had a penny for every time I talked about trying X, only to have a low status guy in the vicinity try to take down the idea, I'd have a lot of pennies right now.

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Wander's avatar

Its funny when that happens, and you double down on your intent to do the thing, then they double down on their "disapproval" of the thing.

I've gotten to maybe 5 times before they finally gave up!

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CL's avatar

You're more patient than me. I think I was baffled and engaged because I didn't understand the behavior. Now I understand it better and I care less. It's already hard enough to make meaningful progress in self improvement that it's not worth being around people who want to bully you into staying mediocre.

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Wander's avatar

I saw it the entire time as a behavior observation thing. The decision had already been made, but it was interesting to watch how far they would take it.

Good work on your self-improvement. Keep it up! And continue ignoring the people who won't support you.

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CL's avatar

Yes, it is odd. In college, I was frustrated with my flexibility even though I was happy overall with my health and physique. I mentioned to a friend that I was starting yoga and he said but you don't do yoga! It was so odd to me and I said, I know that, I am trying it out. He launched into a multi point lecture about how stupid it was and how silly I was going to look. I never thought someone could have so many reasons not to do something they'd never thought about before. I still do yoga but I don't have that friend. Even on a bad day I am more flexible than I was in my 20s before I started.

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BodrevBodrev's avatar

Same experience. And it's always how you're going to look. I had this guy who was trying to talk me out of getting a nice car I liked. First, how I look never factored in at all. Second, I'm going to look bad driving a nice car? What? Lo and behold, after I bought it and repaired it, despite his best attempts to convince me how I'd never be able to do that, everybody loves it.

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