63 Comments
User's avatar
Kelly's avatar

I'm an autistic woman. A common theme among autistics is that we tend to communicate more directly than neurotypicals and that tends not to be appreciated. But around here autistics are equated with gammas. Can anybody explain this apparent contradiction?

Expand full comment
Vox Day's avatar

Autistics sperg out, don't respect social boundaries, and are emotionally oversensitive, not unlike Gammas. They have a similar inability to control themselves.

But technically, being outside the normal neurological range means they probably don't fit in the hierarchy proper and should be considered Omegas.

Expand full comment
JD's avatar

There is not necessarily any contradiction.

Autistic traits in males may be valued differently by women than autistic traits in women are valued by men. Without any evidence whatsoever, I think it would be easier for a moderately fit and attractive autistic woman to find a decent mid level man than if the positions were reversed.

Additionally, a gamma communicating gamma tendencies slightly more directly but with even less social aware ness is likely still going to be perceived gamma.

Lastly, people with autism may be considered gammas because of traits they lack, rather than traits they possess.

Expand full comment
NotYourPalFriend's avatar

"Now, ask yourself what sort of person finds clear, direct, and honest communication to be threatening, an honest person or a dishonest person?"

This aspect of dealing with women, and low status Deltas, and Gammas is why the modern workplace has become almost unbearable.

Expand full comment
Aaron Kulkis's avatar

And the fact that the army is the exact opposite is one of the reasons why I enjoyed it. Even the women who stay in learn to speak directly.

Expand full comment
BeatYourHeadIn's avatar

Off topic: why is it that Aetherczar is always visible as first on the likes list? He's everywhere on substack and always first in the likes queue. What gives!?

Expand full comment
Aaron Kulkis's avatar

How would you notice, and why would you care?

Expand full comment
Benzelrhomb's avatar

“Now, ask yourself what sort of person finds clear, direct, and honest communication to be threatening, an honest person or a dishonest person? The sort of individual who lies to himself is not only going to assume that everyone else is lying, he’s actually going to prefer that others don’t engage in direct and honest communication with him.”

Spot on here.

I believe I contributed to what is referred as a Gamma spiral. All I did was call out a guy for his behaviour with the girls at work and his poor work ethic and the guy went troppo. He also quit.

Just wanted to say thank-you for everyone’s contribution here. Whole situation unfolded like one of Vox’s posts.

It’s a long winded story so I’ll spare the details, but the SSH knowledge correlates insanely well with the situation regarding the guy.

Expand full comment
Patrick's avatar

And these creatures are allowed to vote. 😂

Expand full comment
B. Orpington's avatar

I did this with education as a female. Because of low self esteem, I kept pursuing paper degrees as proof of self-worth. I have a phD, but 6 years of degree seeking is worth way less than my six years of breastfeeding my children. The best start to their lives that I can give them is priceless.

Expand full comment
Okrahead's avatar

All of this is a good reason for women to remain silent in the church as well, and if a woman has a question, to ask her husband about it at home.

Expand full comment
Elijah's avatar

It’s better if you get hit over the head as a young man so you learn this about woman. I listened to a girl in high school concerning a date and a dance and did what she wanted. She acted bored with me and flirted with my friends. Her birthday was a week later. I genuinely got busy and forgot. She acted mad but began to show real desire for me after my “mistake”. We dated for a while and it was rather enjoyable. She liked me more when I seemed not to like her.

Expand full comment
Elijah's avatar

Sad but some truth to this.

Expand full comment
Scott A's avatar

treat them like dirt and they stick to you like mud

Expand full comment
Shefi1280's avatar

"Why can't a woman" (ti-tum-ti-tum) "be more like a man?" (ti-tum-ti-tum)

https://youtu.be/EcpwuK1Fmx4?si=2TW9VfxUd5epzE8R

Expand full comment
Ives's avatar

They are working on that. They figure the best way to do it is by making low status men into women.

Expand full comment
Shefi1280's avatar

😡

Expand full comment
Lacey's avatar

Yep, everything that woman said is 100% true. It was a big wake up call seeing that kind of behavior in myself. I only began to see it after I started dating my now-husband, and he simply refused to engage with my mind games, which forced me to acknowledge what I was doing. Even after years of "radical self honesty", while I don't find clear, direct, and honest communication *threatening*, I do find it *annoying*, because it means I need to be accountable for my words and actions.

Expand full comment
Postcards From A Kitchen's avatar

There was never a better time than to use the following #metoo 😂

Expand full comment
Dave's avatar

My sigma friend is very good at this. He'll ask a yes or no question, there will be this extremely long and winding emotional journey of an explanation from the woman, then he'll just respond, "So yes, or no?". Like, he's actually paying attention to the story but keeps his eye on the ball and won't be misled, it's very impressive.

Expand full comment
The Kurgan's avatar

You win "most honest reply" on the internet today.

Expand full comment
Cedric's avatar

Which is why clear parameters are such a boon for guys.

If he asks for a sandwich, a beer, and 30 minutes of silence when he comes home, before anything, there is nothing she can say or do. If she wants to show that she loves and respects him, she will give him that.

Expand full comment
Mr. Berenstain's avatar

Back in the day, I had my first prom date with a certifiably crazy, yet attractive, dancer and pastor's dsughter.

She said she did not want to be kissed at the end of the night...ok, weird, but whatever, no kiss for you then.

Prom comences, we have fun, was a good prom dance etc. I drive her home, walk her to her front door, she stands at the door looking at me...I give her a hug, "good night," and go on my merry way with no kiss, cleary missing the signal that she changed her mind and wanted a kiss. I drive off and leave her at the door.

She broke up with me shortly thereafter.

Expand full comment
Vox Day's avatar

Here is a suggestion. Do not use words like "no kissy" or "a smooch".

It's all passive language meant to avoid being direct. You don't want to be direct to the point of being vulgar, but childish language should not be utilized by adult men.

Expand full comment
Mr. Berenstain's avatar

My bad, corrected, thanks for reminder.

Expand full comment
Uncouth Barbarian's avatar

"This is one of the differences between high-status men and low-status men. High-status men simply ignore “this weird mental loop” and pursue their objectives without paying any serious attention to what a woman is saying at that particular moment. They don’t take it personally when she says “I hate you” and they don’t put too much stock in her promises either."

Which is why EVERY man wanting a decent woman should just make the kind of hole in his life he wants, and show a possible woman how she'll fit into it. Either she'll accept or not. Conform or not. Run away or not.

Men display, women choose. Most people have it backwards because we THINK it's the other way around, but it's really that way in modern life.

So don't put much stock in their opinions or get caught up in it, like Vox says. Just have fun. Live and laugh with your friends. If she doesn't join YOUR program, then that's her loss. You're the head of household, even if you're a household of 1 at the moment.

Expand full comment
Kevin Meier's avatar

One of my favorite jokes to say when someone is asking me how I figured out a problem or built something complicated. I say I used shear emotion to figure it out. I don't know why I felt the need to share that with you but I feel better now that I have.

Expand full comment
🩷FAT BALD MAN🩷's avatar

One of the best posts.

Expand full comment
C4-621's avatar

Is "Stop Caring" an accurate assessment?

Expand full comment
Ives's avatar

I used to play a lot of poker in the 00's. One of the things that I learned was people play with 2 stacks: their money and their pride. Most players are unwilling to lose out on any hand where they might have a potential winning hand. I'd watch these guys lose tons of money, every time but they always left with their pride intact because they never got bluffed out of a hand.

Real life is a poker game at high school. When it comes to dating and relationships people also play with 2 stacks: desire for someone and their pride. Today most people care about keeping their pride intact.

When people talk about not caring or being indifferent what it means is taking a L to your pride and ego is not a big deal and something you just have to accept and get over.

Once you learn that taking L's to your pride and ego isn't real and only in your head then it's easier to get the things that will make you happy in life.

Expand full comment
Vox Day's avatar

"When people talk about not caring or being indifferent what it means is taking a L to your pride and ego is not a big deal and something you just have to accept and get over."

That's true of normal people, perhaps. A few of us really, truly, and genuinely don't care at all. The average person cannot fathom what genuine indifference is.

Expand full comment
Vox Day's avatar

It's an overstatement. You can care about the woman and her feelings without permitting the latter to derail your objectives or destroy your feelings.

The point is that her words != her feelings over time.

Expand full comment
C4-621's avatar

Thank you

Expand full comment
BodrevBodrev's avatar

If any low status men fears embarrassment by engaging in direct communication and being shot down, just imagine how much more embarrassing it is when you engage in the same games women play all the time, how eyegougingly obvious it is to the woman, and the fact that far from masking your intentions, she fully undersgands what you're doing. It's pretty obvious to all high deltas and above also. Hell, probably even the gammas see through it.

Expand full comment
NotYourPalFriend's avatar

I wouldn't bet money on the Gammas.

Expand full comment