I don’t know how you find the time OR patience to keep trying to help those of us too stupid to absorb sound advice the first dozen-plus times it’s given. Us slow-learners appreciate it, though. Thank you, Vox.
The difference between having to explain something once and having to explain it twelve times is insignificant to one who doesn't understand why any explanation would be necessary in the first place. But you're welcome.
Men that do that are usually just trying to increase their social status by putting others down. They think their “corrections” make them more powerful. School boy mentality - raise your hand and become teacher’s pet with the right answer. They haven’t learned there is no schoolteacher that will give them a pat on the back for being “right”.
What is crucial to know about negative people is Crab mentality. They often just want to drag you down to their level and make you feel they way they feel.
Here is an ancillary truth to this concept. If you find yourself constantly ending up in a contrarian position, you need to evaluate your context and perhaps start searching for a change of venue. Being contrary is valid at the right time, but it is not meant to be a default setting.
"Tell the truth, even if nobody else will. I do it"
"No, no, no, shut your mouth."
Edit: before the goon squad shows up, life is obviously more nuanced than this. If the truth involves "being negative" you still must tell it. Screw everybody that has itching ears to only hear what they want to hear, you must still tell the truth. In the case of this obviously flanderized caricature of stereotypes, don't be negative in celebrating a win with a friend, you ought to rejoice with him. The exception to this is if you know your friend well enough that he'd take it as motivation to do better.
You need not be harsh with the truth except when all other options fail. In any case, the truth only hurts those who refuse to live in truth.
There's no "truth" that applies to this. Telling someone he should have bought a different car, or that he should have started dating Suzy instead of Becky, doesn't tell any truth. Maybe the guy couldn't afford the better car. Maybe he did ask Becky out and Becky said no, or maybe he genuinely likes Suzy better. Just telling him that he should have taken the "better" option doesn't take any "truth" into account because you don't know the full story of why he made his choice.
Now if you had seen a report that your friend's new car's engine was going to catch fire, or you know that Suzy had three convictions for stabbing previous boyfriends, then yeah, tell him that. But that's not the kind of ordinary everyday situation being addressed here.
____________________
$5 says I just wasted a wheelbarrow full of freshly-mined pixels.
Believing is much harder than giving up. Cynics smell like shit because they won't change into a clean shirt. "Why try? All the women are feminists. Why shower for a date you do not have?! Soap is unnecessary. Why go to the gym? Lifting doesn't directly lead to a girlfriend." Your attitude stinks like shit because you stopped. Believers and doers choose to take another shower.
Men who want to find a wife are willing to get rejected by all of the women until they find one single woman who doesn't. Rejections are like scars to men. Add them to the collection. Women who want find a husband continue dating until they find a man who likes her sort of crazy.
I’ve noticed the truth is right there in front of everyone’s faces. I don’t think the “poor errant person in need of me to personally explain the truth” is real. The most successful missionaries mainly spend their day at prayer.
Yeah, that's the case usually. People love the darkness and sin rather than light. Yet, still, we must fulfill our duty and tell the truth not only due to our understanding of standing before Him and giving account, but also because we are called by His name. We don't know which ones the Lord will save, we don't know whether we be sowers or reapers of the sown Word, but we continue nonetheless.
"And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh."
If you want to read some of my previous comments here, the SSH is based solely upon the measure of whoremongering a man accomplishes in a fallen world, and establishes this to be a thing to be desired.
It is a mercy to tell people kindly first about the road they're on, and then bluntly prior to their end.
We tell the truth by living a Christian life, not picking fights… Just because you truly believe you’re clarifying or doing something good doesn’t mean you really are… especially when the facts disagree…
"For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh:
(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)
Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;"
Yes. Many people asked me to write a book on evolution. I first posted my ideas about MITTENS in 2019 and finally got around to writing it in 2025.
But you clearly don't understand the difference between a proactive act and a reactive response. To try to compare a 300-page analysis of the current state of the scientific consensus and raining on someone's parade every time they say anything is a category error.
You're not a truth teller. You're a compulsive contrarian. And the sooner you understand that and learn to control your impulses, the better
First off, I agree with your book without reading it, I didn't need to read it to tell me what I already knew. But, let's get into the deeper motives here.
If nobody asked you to write the book, would it have been wrong to not finish it? Would it have been wrong to not release that truth?
Gaining a better understanding of your perception on truth. Book, substack, both nearly the same in that you share what you think to be truth.
I'm of the opinion that it shouldn't matter what people think or say, the truth must be told regardless. Even if you're thought of as contrarian, even if it meant being stripped of every worldly good, the truth is far more important.
One of my life's regrets is having abused that cloud of negativity of my mom: As a kid I had a phase of constantly trying to outdo my brother just so that my mom would put him down by comparing him to me. Fortunately I made up with my brother, but my mom's negativity has never really changed and nowadays she is constantly dismayed about her sons rarely ever calling her.
So please take Vox' advice to heart, especially around the kids.
“Helping” is just their pride, usually the one being “helped” has way more real reasons to be proud. They’re so compulsive like it’s a deeply held belief that nobody else can be more right than they are ever and they must evangelize to convert everybody over to believing in their rightness.
I would posit that it’s really established scientism which has taken the contrarian position for decades. They began with an absurdity - essentially, claiming that the world as it is just happened by accident in order to remove God from the equation - and then backed that absurdity with mountains of erroneous science to make it all seem plausible. That it took this long for someone to detangle the math just shows how successful smart people can be when pursuing a false but seductive idea.
As to the game of making a contrarian look stupid, the whole circus around Billie Eilush (typo, but I’m keeping it) has been a great example of how to play.
There’s a difference between staking out a contrarian position publicly and reflexively correcting people in one-on-one conversations. Even when the correction is technically right, it often just comes off as tedious. Don’t be the reality police.
Negative people always think they are negative because negative things always happen to and around them when it's really their attitude that brings it on them and no one wants to help them.
As soon as i give someone the Shut Up Look, their immediate response is, " I'm not being negative, i'm just stating the facts! Do you want to be uninformed? You're making yourself look ridiculous!" Every time.
G: " I'm not being negative, i'm just stating the facts! Do you want to be uninformed? You're making yourself look ridiculous!"
B: Oh, we're just stating facts, are we? Then, you're fat, you need to take a shower because you smell like a hog, your neckbeard makes you look like a pedophile, and I don't know a single person who enjoys being around you.
G: .....
.....
B: What, come back, don't cry, I'm not being negative, i'm just stating the facts! Do you want to be uninformed? You're making yourself look ridiculous!
It's interesting that the cynic and the Debbie Downer always think their constant negativity makes them incisive or closer to the truth, when the Truth is that Jesus Christ has conquered death and hell, and we live in a world populated by sons and daughters of God. Why is being positive, and happy, and pleasant, and supportive somehow "banal"?
If anybody reading this has found that impulse within themselves, the impulse to be negative because they see themselves as the local Truthteller, one thing that might help them is to realize that saying "hey, that's freaking awesome, Stoke! That is incredible that you landed a Gucci sponsorship!" is ALSO the truth, even if you're the 56th person to say that, instead of the First.
Jesus went about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the devil--He didn't go about making sure everyone knew that their belt didn't match their shoes.
"The Devil doesn't need an advocate. He's doing fine already." ~ Seth Godin
I don’t know how you find the time OR patience to keep trying to help those of us too stupid to absorb sound advice the first dozen-plus times it’s given. Us slow-learners appreciate it, though. Thank you, Vox.
The difference between having to explain something once and having to explain it twelve times is insignificant to one who doesn't understand why any explanation would be necessary in the first place. But you're welcome.
There must also be a lack of manners and overall social awareness because you can be without empathy and function. Plenty of people do it.
Men that do that are usually just trying to increase their social status by putting others down. They think their “corrections” make them more powerful. School boy mentality - raise your hand and become teacher’s pet with the right answer. They haven’t learned there is no schoolteacher that will give them a pat on the back for being “right”.
What is crucial to know about negative people is Crab mentality. They often just want to drag you down to their level and make you feel they way they feel.
Here is an ancillary truth to this concept. If you find yourself constantly ending up in a contrarian position, you need to evaluate your context and perhaps start searching for a change of venue. Being contrary is valid at the right time, but it is not meant to be a default setting.
A contrarian will enter heaven just to tell everyone in there ,how the real world is not all joy and beauty. Only to find out nobody cares.
Pack your bags -contrarian-, take your hard truths and head on down to the other place.
Have you noticed gammas are always "He got a girlfriend and stopped calling at all."
Real mystery for the ages why that happens.
"Tell the truth, even if nobody else will. I do it"
"No, no, no, shut your mouth."
Edit: before the goon squad shows up, life is obviously more nuanced than this. If the truth involves "being negative" you still must tell it. Screw everybody that has itching ears to only hear what they want to hear, you must still tell the truth. In the case of this obviously flanderized caricature of stereotypes, don't be negative in celebrating a win with a friend, you ought to rejoice with him. The exception to this is if you know your friend well enough that he'd take it as motivation to do better.
You need not be harsh with the truth except when all other options fail. In any case, the truth only hurts those who refuse to live in truth.
There's no "truth" that applies to this. Telling someone he should have bought a different car, or that he should have started dating Suzy instead of Becky, doesn't tell any truth. Maybe the guy couldn't afford the better car. Maybe he did ask Becky out and Becky said no, or maybe he genuinely likes Suzy better. Just telling him that he should have taken the "better" option doesn't take any "truth" into account because you don't know the full story of why he made his choice.
Now if you had seen a report that your friend's new car's engine was going to catch fire, or you know that Suzy had three convictions for stabbing previous boyfriends, then yeah, tell him that. But that's not the kind of ordinary everyday situation being addressed here.
____________________
$5 says I just wasted a wheelbarrow full of freshly-mined pixels.
You're also wrong today.
Believing is much harder than giving up. Cynics smell like shit because they won't change into a clean shirt. "Why try? All the women are feminists. Why shower for a date you do not have?! Soap is unnecessary. Why go to the gym? Lifting doesn't directly lead to a girlfriend." Your attitude stinks like shit because you stopped. Believers and doers choose to take another shower.
Men who want to find a wife are willing to get rejected by all of the women until they find one single woman who doesn't. Rejections are like scars to men. Add them to the collection. Women who want find a husband continue dating until they find a man who likes her sort of crazy.
🤣🤣🤣 again, though hard to believe, someone shows up to prove Vox point, without the tiniest hint of self awareness. It is fascinating.
I’ve noticed the truth is right there in front of everyone’s faces. I don’t think the “poor errant person in need of me to personally explain the truth” is real. The most successful missionaries mainly spend their day at prayer.
Yeah, that's the case usually. People love the darkness and sin rather than light. Yet, still, we must fulfill our duty and tell the truth not only due to our understanding of standing before Him and giving account, but also because we are called by His name. We don't know which ones the Lord will save, we don't know whether we be sowers or reapers of the sown Word, but we continue nonetheless.
Will you have some points but you forget the other part that should not be parted from truth which is mercy. Without it it´s just cold and cruel.
Jude 1:23
"And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh."
If you want to read some of my previous comments here, the SSH is based solely upon the measure of whoremongering a man accomplishes in a fallen world, and establishes this to be a thing to be desired.
It is a mercy to tell people kindly first about the road they're on, and then bluntly prior to their end.
We tell the truth by living a Christian life, not picking fights… Just because you truly believe you’re clarifying or doing something good doesn’t mean you really are… especially when the facts disagree…
2 Corinthians 10:3-5
"For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh:
(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)
Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;"
This is what I'm doing here.
No. You do not need to "tell the truth" when no one is asking you for it.
No one is telling you to lie. You're being told to shut up. So shut up unless and until your opinion is requested.
Did anyone ask for your books or are you just "telling the truth"? Or is it a more nuanced circumstance?
Go ahead and ban me if you want.
Daring Vox to ban you. Laughable really, when the beatings will serve as a lesson to the others and a morale booster for the group.
FFS a book just sits there, inert, until someone reads it. The act of opening up and reading it is asking to know what his thoughts are.
This is sad. Stop it.
Yes. Many people asked me to write a book on evolution. I first posted my ideas about MITTENS in 2019 and finally got around to writing it in 2025.
But you clearly don't understand the difference between a proactive act and a reactive response. To try to compare a 300-page analysis of the current state of the scientific consensus and raining on someone's parade every time they say anything is a category error.
You're not a truth teller. You're a compulsive contrarian. And the sooner you understand that and learn to control your impulses, the better
First off, I agree with your book without reading it, I didn't need to read it to tell me what I already knew. But, let's get into the deeper motives here.
If nobody asked you to write the book, would it have been wrong to not finish it? Would it have been wrong to not release that truth?
This beautifully illustrates the above comment about the no, yeah, for sure, but...
No. Because writing a book is an individual activity has nothing to do with a personal conversation between two people.
What is your grounds for attempting to conflate the two very distinct actions?
Gaining a better understanding of your perception on truth. Book, substack, both nearly the same in that you share what you think to be truth.
I'm of the opinion that it shouldn't matter what people think or say, the truth must be told regardless. Even if you're thought of as contrarian, even if it meant being stripped of every worldly good, the truth is far more important.
One of my life's regrets is having abused that cloud of negativity of my mom: As a kid I had a phase of constantly trying to outdo my brother just so that my mom would put him down by comparing him to me. Fortunately I made up with my brother, but my mom's negativity has never really changed and nowadays she is constantly dismayed about her sons rarely ever calling her.
So please take Vox' advice to heart, especially around the kids.
“Helping” is just their pride, usually the one being “helped” has way more real reasons to be proud. They’re so compulsive like it’s a deeply held belief that nobody else can be more right than they are ever and they must evangelize to convert everybody over to believing in their rightness.
Ackshully it's incorrect to say EVERYBODY hates contrarians. Have you polled the entire world on this question?
For real though, great article. There's definitely people that need to hear this.
I would posit that it’s really established scientism which has taken the contrarian position for decades. They began with an absurdity - essentially, claiming that the world as it is just happened by accident in order to remove God from the equation - and then backed that absurdity with mountains of erroneous science to make it all seem plausible. That it took this long for someone to detangle the math just shows how successful smart people can be when pursuing a false but seductive idea.
As to the game of making a contrarian look stupid, the whole circus around Billie Eilush (typo, but I’m keeping it) has been a great example of how to play.
Stoke with Gucci as his sponsor - style points, and Jami going out of this world. Costs nothing to say "Looks great, and congratulations!"
There’s a difference between staking out a contrarian position publicly and reflexively correcting people in one-on-one conversations. Even when the correction is technically right, it often just comes off as tedious. Don’t be the reality police.
Negative people always think they are negative because negative things always happen to and around them when it's really their attitude that brings it on them and no one wants to help them.
As soon as i give someone the Shut Up Look, their immediate response is, " I'm not being negative, i'm just stating the facts! Do you want to be uninformed? You're making yourself look ridiculous!" Every time.
Familiar conversation! I used to think the Need to Inform was just boomeritis
I didn't ask for the facts. I didn't ask to be informed.
Shut your fucking mouth.
G: " I'm not being negative, i'm just stating the facts! Do you want to be uninformed? You're making yourself look ridiculous!"
B: Oh, we're just stating facts, are we? Then, you're fat, you need to take a shower because you smell like a hog, your neckbeard makes you look like a pedophile, and I don't know a single person who enjoys being around you.
G: .....
.....
B: What, come back, don't cry, I'm not being negative, i'm just stating the facts! Do you want to be uninformed? You're making yourself look ridiculous!
It's interesting that the cynic and the Debbie Downer always think their constant negativity makes them incisive or closer to the truth, when the Truth is that Jesus Christ has conquered death and hell, and we live in a world populated by sons and daughters of God. Why is being positive, and happy, and pleasant, and supportive somehow "banal"?
If anybody reading this has found that impulse within themselves, the impulse to be negative because they see themselves as the local Truthteller, one thing that might help them is to realize that saying "hey, that's freaking awesome, Stoke! That is incredible that you landed a Gucci sponsorship!" is ALSO the truth, even if you're the 56th person to say that, instead of the First.
Jesus went about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the devil--He didn't go about making sure everyone knew that their belt didn't match their shoes.