Intelligence is a Social Handicap
Not all gifts and talents are socially desirable
Many smart men, and smart women, erroneously believe that their intelligence is a strongly positive asset that ranks up there with beauty, height, agreeableness, and wealth as a primary attractant. But in truth, it isn’t and it never has been, for sexual or social relations.
Consider this excerpt from TAIKO by Eiji Yoshigawa, published in Japan in 1967.
While Kahei had not spelled out what he had in mind, Hiyhoshi already understood.
His quickness bewilders the people around him, Kahei thought. It’s only natural this breeds resentment and jealousy.
“If you don’t hide that intelligence of yours, you’ll never succeed.”
“I know.”
“If you knew, why did you speak abusively like today, making everybody angry?”
“I’m inexperienced…”
“I’m not going to say any more. Because your intelligence is valuable, I’m going to help you. I can tell you know that those who resented you and were jealous of you accused you of theft on the slightest pretext. There was no end to their spiteful talk. You easily provoke the resentment of others. You should understand that about yourself.”
Intelligence is valuable. But valuable is not synonymous with attractive, likeable, or popular.
Women are attracted to men who are more intelligent than they are. But we’re talking about an advantage of 5-15 IQ points at most, or less than one standard deviation. It’s not a case of more being more, as with other desirable traits. This should not be a difficult concept to grasp considering that communication is considered essentially impossible across a 2 SD gap.
And smart women would do well to understand that men prefer women to be less intelligent than they are, which is obviously necessary given the female preference for a smarter man. The more intelligent a man is, the more he understands that a woman is not going to respect him if she is smarter than he is.
So, the point is this: don’t attempt to trade on the basis of an undervalued good.
Pleasant is more valuable than Intelligent, as valued by others. If we're binding ourselves one to another, we should at least be able to stand each other's company.
The example of the spinster correcting her 90-something father's story *on factual details* is an indelible memory for me. Possibly intelligent; dumber than a sack of rocks in practice.
Very true. I learnt from an early age that when hot young lady asked what I did or what I studied, or how things worked a crack of the knuckles and "let me explain" led to blank stares and boredom and looks like you´re a freak, even when all the signs were formerly there. I now have some VHIQ and UHIQ dudes to chew over the nitty gritty with and when in a new social setting would answer what I do as something like "I get paid to fly around the world talking shit to people all day" and get laughs and very few if only superficial questions.
I think women want the mystery of the high IQ,but they don´t want to feel like a retard when you talk to them.